Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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