The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
