Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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