she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
The power of my boobs compel you
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
