my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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