There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize