Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
