i would punch a child for taco bell
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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