More tranny stories later!
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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