There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
