no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
