So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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