Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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