She announced her abortion via fbk
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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