Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
