I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
