i was born a porn star she said
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
As shirtless as possible
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
