Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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