so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Mom said you looked used
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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