Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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