well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize