Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
