so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
