someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
where does the pee come out of this thing
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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