So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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