I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
