I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
handjob tips. give me some.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Randomize