how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
