please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Randomize
