I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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