you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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