i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
