I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I'm too high and old for this...
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
