Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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