Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
She said her name was "party"
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
