mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
