I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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