Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
