is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
