i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
