if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
