so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
