There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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