Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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