road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Randomize