need another drink. this is the easiest way
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
