He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
