I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Randomize
