I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
