HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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